Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

what did the guy say on friday ? ah man im so glad its not monday tuesday wednesday thursday friday saturday sunday he then threw a horse at a plane while moonwalking on a star that was riding a duck that was on a rabbit. Sir jumpalot was working overtime as he had to pay for a free phone

Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

What's brown and sticky? Syrup.

Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

a black man pays his child support

What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...