your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

What has 4 eyes, but can't see? 2 blind people.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

-Why did Sara fall off the swing? -I don't know, why? -She had no arms, knock knock -Who's there? -Not Sara.

Carlton

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

Q; What's something that's long and girls like to suck? A: A popsicle

Why did the old man die? Because everyone dies

nathan palmer has a big head !

"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...