Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

Q: Why was the gorrilla arrested? A: He broke a law.

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

knock knock who`s there me oh come in

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

u know whats a crime? rape

An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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