When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

What's worse than strapping 10 dead baibes to a tree? Strapping a dead baby to 10 trees.

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

what's funny about war? nothing!

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

u know whats a crime? rape

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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