Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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If i was gay... I would have strong sexual feelings towards peolple of the same sex as me

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

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What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops