(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What do family members and a loaf of bread have in common? If you smash them with a hammer they die.

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my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

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Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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Holocost jokes arent even that funny, Anne Frank-ly they annoy me.

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How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

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One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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