Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

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A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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What's the humor in an elevator? Me jumping up and down yelling we r all gonna die.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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guess what what ...

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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I'm 23, just like most people my age.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

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Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

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A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

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Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

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What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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How many black men can you fit into a mini? Five One in the drivers seat. One in the passenger seat. And three in the back seats. Anymore would be both dangerous and impractical due to the small interior volume of the car, and it would also put a significant strain on the cars limited engine power. Especially when tackling a steep incline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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