Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

thumb_up thumb_down -39

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

thumb_up thumb_down -41

One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What did Osama say before he was shot? Nothing, it was a surprise attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

How do you stop a black kid from hanging around in your back yard? Hang him in the front yard.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

thumb_up thumb_down -47

A Christian asks god why there is so much pain and grief in the world. God does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops