A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

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The tooth fairy, Santa and, Justin Beiber are the same, little kids believe in them, whats wrong with America these days

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Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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Why? Why not?

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1: I heard a great knock knock joke, but you have to start it. 2: Okay, knock knock! 1: Who's there? 2: ???

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How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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