What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

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bite me

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why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

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Whats the leading cause of death Life.

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

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A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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