Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "you sir are gay!" The gay man says, "I take offense to that!" The bartender then replies "how may I help you."

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

He who laughs last gathers no moss.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

What is a dyslexic mathematician's favourite song? Angels. [L]

I was relaxing on the beach today when a fat bird came over and said, "Would you rub this lotion into my back please?" "I'm afraid I'm only here for the day," I replied.

Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

Why did the referee go to the zoo? He likes animals

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

A blonde walked into a bank. She deposited her check, thanked the teller, and promptly left.

There are ten million million million million million million million million million million million sub-atomic particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mamma took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd...

What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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