What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

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I like to eat.

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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Whats white and can't climb trees? A Fridge

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What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

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Binladen coming to a beach near you :D

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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LAMBORGHINI MERCY, YO CHICK SHE SO THIRSTY! IM IN THAT 2 SEAT LAMBO WITH YO GIRL... and I'm giving her some Gatorade because it'll quench her thirst but I'm making sure she doesn't spill on my seats because it's new, k

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Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

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Freedom of Speech

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Matt swam through watter. Gaby drowned on dry land.

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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