What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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Hahahahahhaha...................................black people

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

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Obama

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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Where was little suzie the day after the house fire? At the hospital, being treated for minor burns.

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why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

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There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

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Why did the kid fail the test? Because he was retarded.

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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If life hands you lemons Take them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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