Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Burp

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Jay-Z

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Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

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how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops