When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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In soviet russia...the abundance of natural oils and rich agricultural land provide it with a thriving economy

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

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There was a 4-car accident in Mexico today. 87 people died.

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Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

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Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

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why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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why did the boy die? because he got shot

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

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What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops