Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

Okay.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

what did one computer say to the other .........

What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

When does the Narwhal bacon? The Narwhal bacons at mid-night.

What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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