- Anti Joke

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

Roses are red Violets are blue The last time I saw your mom I made you

What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

Whats the leading cause of death Life.

What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

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Why were the police chasing the black man? Because he was in such a poor financial state that the bank foreclosed his house and now he has no source of income and therefore no way to purchase basic living requirements, so he was forced to steal in order to provide food for his family.

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

What did superman say when he flew into a building? Flying is inhumanly possible unless in an aircraft vehicle.

A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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