what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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whats bad about being black and jewish they have to sit in the back of the oven

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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Why wouldn't Leena sleep with Ole? Because she thought him to be a dumb, ugly, Scandinavian.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

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I was going to tell a gay joke. But that would offensive

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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