What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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I like to eat.

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What's green and wheels? Your mom.

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how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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