Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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