A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhymming you have nice boobs

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

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Mogok Papiti.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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