eoin burgin is fat

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What's red and has four letters? A stop sign

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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What did the lawyer say to the Black man? Your case came through, the murderer of your wife has been caught

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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Yo Mama just died.

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Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

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Man says, "Hello" Girl, "Do you wanna go out?" Man, "With you?" Girl, "YES!" Man, "NO, bye!"

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Why do people waste there time writing Anti-Jokes Becuase they enjoy there right to the 1st ammendment and who are we to question it

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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What did the dead man say to his best friend? Nothing.

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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