What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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a sausage maker buys a box of cereal

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

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whats long and hard and full of seamen a penis

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

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Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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