Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

A man walks into a bar not a duck though

What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

What did the ginger say to god? Nothing it has no soul

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

What did the horse say to the other horse? neh

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...