What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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What's just not right? Left

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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Double-whammy

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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