Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

Your mamas so fat, she was self-conscious about her weight and became an antisocial vegetable.

Roses are red Violets are blue Not all poems rhyme Penis

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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