Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Potassium? K.

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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what did the penguin say to the other penguin after they rolled down a hill, and fell into a pile of leaves then proceeded to go swimming, play basketball, go swimming again and then play ping pong and pool? nothing. penguins cant talk

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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