Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

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Anti jokes are funny

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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Brett Farve

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Whats worse then a Republican? 9/11.

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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Potato salad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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