Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Did you hear about the blond that jumped off a bridge? She died.

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

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How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

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Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

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Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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