Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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nolan is gay

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WHATS A CRUM AND LIVES IN A SLUM ?? A BOY CALLED KEVIN CRUMMY

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Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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A stripper walks into a bar. She works there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

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Q: Why does it snow in Canada and not in Mexico? A: Because Canada is far from the equator and Mexico isn't.

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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What did the Asian get on his math assignment? 56%, he forgot about it and passed it in a day late with a number of questions uncompleted.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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A Jew and a German meet by chance in a bar. They exchange pleasantries and order drinks. At the end of the evening they leave, having made a friend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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