A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

Kobe Bryant passing the ball

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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