if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

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A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

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why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

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Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

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Why did the faggot cross the road? Because he was a faggot.

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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Q: Whats the difference between a table and a Mexican? A: You tell me.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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