What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

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Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

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Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

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What do you call a joke that is not funny? An un - funny joke.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

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Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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Why did the black man get shot Cause someone shot him

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

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What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

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How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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