Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

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I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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some kid told me pink dolphin clothiing was nigged, so i took an eraser , gave it to his sister and beat the poop out of hiis car ON A THURSDAY!!!!!!

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Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

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I will slam your FACE into the BOOK if you don't stay out of MY SPACE

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

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What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

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Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

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Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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