What's worse then 2 dead monkeys? 3 dead monkeys!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

thumb_up thumb_down -3

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats the difference between a European and a african an african has more pigment in his skin due to prolonged exposure to light

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -3

this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

[Set up] [No punch line]

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A woman is shopping at a grocery store. She picks up a half gallon of skim milk, 2 loaves of wheat bread, one dozen organic eggs, and some carrots. She goes to the checkout line. "You must be single." the clerk says. Amazed at the flattering insight of the clerk, the woman says, "Yes I am. How could you tell?". "Because you're ugly".

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

thumb_up thumb_down -3

pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops