A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

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Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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Why did the boy die of Cancer? Because I took some radioactive chemicals and hen I feel like it I beat him with it.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

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What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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What do you call it wen black people are sky diving? ...Night

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow wh- MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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