A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

roses are red violets are blue corey mills is and got raped by you

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops