What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

how do you make a baby stop crying? but hot coals down its throat

Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

An Irishman walks into a bar.....Duh.

how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

Why couldn't Jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

Why does Joel's breathe smell?

There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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