What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

Q: Whats the difference between me and a ghost? A: Ghosts arnt dolphins!

your mom.

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

why did the boy die? because he got shot

How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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