why did the shark bite the surf board? It thought it was turtle.

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? AIDs then he got mugged on the way home from the hospital

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

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Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

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I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

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how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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How many stripes are there on a policeman's socks? None, policemen must wear regulation plain black socks.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

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What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

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a cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. the cat is then escorted out of the bar because a cat in a bar is unsanitary. and they do not serve milk.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

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what do u call a guy with 4 nipples? Hairy Styles

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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