What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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Global Warming.

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what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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How did the man become sterilized? Blow-dart through the testicle.

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Chuck Norris died.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? The jew is a human being while the pizza is a combination of things such as sauce, bread, cheese and many other toppings made available to the buyer

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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What is a dog? Bark

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So a man walks into a wedding and asks the waiter where the to wait for the punch... the waiter says, "there is no punchline."

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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ghjwASFDJHKJZFKLJFHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHA GGGG DG FUC K DISLIKE ME!

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Today I exchanged money for Meth. There is no joke here. I'm a drug addict

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Why do black people smell? So blind people can hate them too.

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why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

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why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

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what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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