How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

live babies

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

What is the difference between Whitney Houston and Elvis. They are dead. And it make people go boo hoo

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

Roses are red Roses are red What is big Cherenets head

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

DERP

Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

Global Warming.

How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

Mmmmmmm Lemons

Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

You.

Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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