What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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Military intelligence.

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Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

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Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

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What is the difference between Jews and the boyscouts? The boyscouts come home from camp.

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roses are black violets are gray im color blind

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Women's rights

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In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

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- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

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Why did the kid fail the test? Because he was retarded.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

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knock knock whos there .. derp

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Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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