Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

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A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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What stops a train? A missile

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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