- Anti Joke

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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human centipede

This is Mr.Bear you all are on rtc for the next week. See me in G7 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q.Why was the man so fat A. because he had to much to eat

Apple hates Blackberry.

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.