A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

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how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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i committed murder

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

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An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

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Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

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Boob

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Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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