Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

what is one black person on the moon? Anser: a problem What is all the black peaple on the moon...... a solution.

-Knock Knock -Anthony got in a car crash -Who's There -He died

What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

What is Jason? Black.

That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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