What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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What did the banana say to the tree? Nothing, bananas can't talk

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

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ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I OFFERED YOU SOME CEREAL, MADE OUT OF MY DOGS POO BY VICKY AND RENATA WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

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Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

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Why do we park in driveways and drive in parkways? Good question.

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

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jd and zach loves vigina

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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the person above me ^ lost his virginity to a howler monkey and the person below me was his gay friend untill he found out about his recent run in with a howler monkey and does not wish the same fait as he does.

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

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Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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