how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

Q: Why did the black man win the 100 meter dash? A: Because ever since he heard of this event, he has spent weeks preparing for it.

what is the difference between a picture of brooklyn decker and my grandma....i jack off to the picture of my grandma

Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

Obama lin Baden.

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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