Chuck Norris can carry very heavy objects.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, So what is the colour violet for?

What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The band.

You know what's funny? A well told joke

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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