(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=eOr5o3kd5fIcpM:&imgrefurl=http://imgfave.com/search/be%2520stupid&docid=_B1z3__jBeF0wM&imgurl=http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1vrh3OhfK1r158a9o1_500.jpg&w=485&h=650&ei=Jo3HT-anK4To9ASrrp2KDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=104&vpy=105&dur=1249&hovh=260&hovw=194&tx=86&ty=138&sig=104463583013410208018&page=3&tbnh=162&tbnw=121&start=23&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:23,i:149

Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

human centipede

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

I like school Said no one ever.

What's going to happen you? Your going to die just like everyone else in the world. Don't laugh, it's not funny

What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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