What do you call a boy with no arms and legs? Simply a pillow

What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

Doctor, I am afraid of doctors, I dont even dare seek them up. Janitor: Thats quite apparent... Dr.Moral:

who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

Q. What did the chicken do when it lost its egg? A. It went to go look for it. Q. Why was the chicken scared of the duck? A. Because it was chicken Q.Why can't chickens fly? A. Because they don't want to Q.Why can't chickens swim? A. Because they don't want to Q. Whey do chickens cluck? A. Because they want to Q. Why did the chicken jump on top of a car? A. Because it knows how Q. Why doesn't a chicken have hands? A. Because it's not human Q. What did the chicken dream about? A. Chicken dreams Q. Why was the chicken lost? A. Because it wasn't found Q. Why wasn't the chicken afriad of the dog? A. Because the chicken was blind Q. Why doesn't the chicken know how to drive a car A. Because they don't need to

Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

Yo mama's like Darfur: Everyone feels bad for her, but nobody offers any substantial assistance.

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

what does idk mean? i dont know!! nobody knows!!

What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

Five guys in white sheets chase a black man down the street. It is Halloween and all six people are close friends and enjoy goofing around.

yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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