A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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UN

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

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rarw

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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