A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

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Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

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Why did the asian man go to the bar with a black man? Because they both wanted to enjoy a few beers in the company of another.

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What's worse then Justin Bieber? 9-11

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How do you get a black man out of your seat? You ask him very nicely with a great attitude.

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There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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my wife out of the kitchen

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What happen to the guy who stole the TV. He runs away as he fears the person that stoled his/her TV reports him/her to the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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